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Friday, November 23rd, 2007
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11:27 pm
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| Sunday, October 2nd, 2005
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11:49 am - A Crime of Passion
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Here's one for ya. In my social deviance class, my professor administered a survey to everyong to find how deviant our class is. Some of the questions were 'have you ever cheated on a test' and 'have you ever stolen anything worth more than 50 dollars.' The next day, while going over the responses, he got to the question "have you ever murdered anyone?" 21 people in the class said 'no.' One person said 'yes'. Then there was an akward silence for a couple minutes.
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| Saturday, May 21st, 2005
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4:02 pm - more like STUPIDmaster
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| Tuesday, April 26th, 2005
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7:12 pm
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Dont get your hopes up, this is just to let you all know that I'm stil alive.
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, September 22nd, 2004
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2:01 am - Ninja
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Saturday night, driving back to my place around 1 in the morning. I see a dark figure walking alone down the street. As I get closer, I realize that this dark figure is a living, breathing ninja. That's right. Clad in dark black clothes from head to toe, the ninja had a plunger strapped on his back in place of a samurai sword. Although still partially in shock, I manage to beep the horn at this ancient warrior. He whips out what appeared to be a pair of glow-stick nunchucks and demonstrated some lethal moves for me. I drove off into the night, leaving the ninja to go about his business. Maybe one day our paths will cross again...
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| Friday, July 9th, 2004
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9:35 pm - Eerie
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Donald Rumsfeld, O.J. Simpson, and Fred Savage....all born on July 9th. Coincidence? You tell me.
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(comment on this)
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| Saturday, February 21st, 2004
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11:33 pm - GNC - Helping you lead your best life.
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So, I am back in the work-force...no longer a leech on society. Though it was fun while it lasted. I had my first day at GNC yesterday. The only thing that stopped me from killing myself from boredom was the customers, who sometimes were few and far between. At one point, a young man dropped by. He launched into an informative, and well-practiced, speech about how it is tough being homeless. He told us he had been going from store to store in the shopping center asking for donations. Now, not to be insensitive, but this homeless guy was wearing a Nike jacket and wearing a pair of headphones. After my boss gave him a dollar 'just to get him out of the store' he told me that the only reason he felt the guy actually might have been homeless was because of the pungeant odor he was giving off. Next, a young lady enters and walks right up to the counter. "I need something to clean out my system....because I have to pass a test in a few days," she explains. My boss tells her that the product she wants as been banned in New Jersey for the exact reason why she wanted it. Fortunately for her, Pennsylvania still allows the product, so my boss gave her directions to the nearest store in Philly. A few hours of standing around goes by. Then a young couple walks in. I ask if they need any help and the guy is quick to say no. About two seconds later, the woman comes up to the counter and rather openly explains (much to her husband's embarrassment) that he is having a libido problem. The time it took to find and purchase the product must have been the most embarrassing five minutes or so of this guy's life. So, it's not the best job in the world. And the boredom can kind of get to you. But the interesting cast of characters that come in would definitely make for a good reality TV series.
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| Sunday, February 8th, 2004
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2:46 pm - Riddle
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Today's Riddle: What do I have in common with the following people?
Jesse James (the cowboy dude who killed people) Jason Alexander (played George on Seinfeld) Jason Lee (played Brody in Mallrats) Michael Jordan (some basketball player) Patrick Stewart (bald dude on Star Trek) Nolan Ryan (baseball pitcher) Rick James (the super freak)
If you know the answer, don't respond. Instead, add another person who also fits the criteria. Thanks for playing.
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| Wednesday, February 4th, 2004
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3:33 pm - Everybody was Kung Fu fighting
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Are you bored? Are you a democrat? Are you a republican? If you answered 'yes' to all, any, or none of these questions, I think I have something you might be interested in. It's simple, free, and fun. All you have to do is go to www.google.com and do a search for 'miserable failure' and see what comes up. If you liked that, try doing a search for 'weapons of mass destruction' Funny stuff.
My persuasion and social influence professor is the man. The class is all about getting the best value for your money and avoiding scams. So he does all this 'research' at various stores by trying to bargain with people and find out what techniques work. On Thursday he was telling us that he used to work at a telemarketing firm. He was an assistant or something like that so he was in charge of hiring people. One day, a guy comes in and says to him, "I need a thousand bucks by next week...can I make that working here." So my professor tells him that it's not likely because his best employees only make about 500 in a week. The guy is persistent so my professor gives him the job. The guy turns out to be the best salesman and most persuasive guy he's ever seen.
Then my professor goes on to tell me that he did some research regarding martial arts studios. This was back in the '70s with the whole Bruce Lee/Kung Fu craze. So he looked a place up in the phone book. He called the number and the guy who answered asks for my professor's address. He gives it to him and in a week or so he gets a letter in the mail. It tells him to be outside the Green Dragon Kung Fu Studio at exactly 6 o'clock on the following Wednesday. So my professor goes there and promptly at 6 o'clock the door opens and the people waiting are ushered inside. The room is painted completely black from floor to ceiling and the only light is coming from candles placed around the room. The guy who answered the door was wearing an all black karate uniform. He told them to line up and take their shoes off. Then, he tells them they all have to go to another room and meet the grand buddah of Green Dragon Kung Fu, or something like that. So one by one they go back there and return to the main room when they are done. The dude in the black karate uniform informs some of them that the grand buddah deemed them unworthy and they must leave immediatly. Anyway, it's finally my professor's turn to talk to the buddah. So he goes back there and kneels where he is supposed to, right in front of the grand buddah. The buddah is sitting legs crossed, head down. He waits a good thirty seconds before looking up and acknowleding my professor. When he finally does look at him they both burst out laughing. It turns out the buddah was the same guy who had worked at the telemarketing firm with my professor a few years earlier. My professor is like, "what are you doing here?" The guy tells him he doesn't know anything about kung fu, he just opened the store to capitalize on the whole martial arts craze. So, obviously my professor stopped taking lessons there. And, a few months later, the whole Kung Fu studio closed up and left over night and my professor never saw the guy again.
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Friday, January 30th, 2004
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11:25 am - Phones
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I got a new cell phone last month but I am too lazy to program the names from my old phone into this new one. So whenever I go somewhere with the possibility of needing to call someone, I carry both phones with me. I get the number from the old one and use the new one to call the person. It's worth it though...the new phone is really cool looking.
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(comment on this)
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| Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
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7:22 pm - NaCl = Good
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Dear Donny Farish, If you insist on having school on a day like this, it wouldn't kill you to put some salt on the sidewalks.
XOXO, Mike
P.S. - Thanks for waiting until after my four classes to close the school (even though the weather was exactly the same this morning and afternoon as it is this evening).
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9:11 am - No Buzz = More Heat
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For those of you who don't know, the heater in my room used to make the most annoying 'buzzing' noise in the world. It sounded like a giant mutated fly was living in our heating duct. No worry though, I fixed the problem. I jammed part of a clothes hanger in between the wall and the heater to hold the buzzing mechanism in place. Problem solved. Yesterday, however, I walk into my room and it feels like a suana. Coincidence? Let's just hope so.
current mood: hot
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| Saturday, January 24th, 2004
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1:28 pm - New Year's Resolutions
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Well it's been awhile. I haven't been busy, just lazy. Back at Rowan. Here are some of my New Year's Resolutions: 1. Learn to stop time 2. Become a superhero 3. Look like the Ultimate Warrior (minus the face paint) 4. Become a billionaire 5. Get good grades I know this might seem hard to do, but I figure if I study hard I should be able to do pretty well in my classes.
Awhile ago I tried to create a new screen name for myself. I wanted it to be 'Mike'. But when I tried to register for it, they told me it was already taken. So I put the name on my buddy list hoping to talk to the guy and persuade him to give me the name. That was about a year and a half ago. To this day he has never been online. I bet one of the people who invented instant messenger was named Mike and used that for his screen name. For all we know he could be dead by now and, therefore, the name would pretty much become extinct as well. So, if anyone has any ideas of how I can get this screen name, or how I could figure out his password and steal it, please let me know. Or, by some weird coincidence, you are 'Mike' and happen to be reading this, please contact me as soon as possible.
Speaking of instant messenger, I recently maxed out the names on my buddy list. 200 names. Granted, some of these are names that people no longer use and some are names of those weirdos who IM random people, but it still felt like a noteworthy accomplishment. And that's all that matters.
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| Friday, December 19th, 2003
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10:49 am - I was a vegetarian for about 10 minutes
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I finished my public speaking final the other day and was walking back from class. A few days before, I had given my final speech about why people should convert to vegetarianism (twice I mentioned that I was not one myself). So, while walking back to my apartment, a kid from my class, who I never really talked to, stops me and asks me how the "vegetarian thing" is going for me. Before I could really think about it, I blurted out, "it's going pretty good." I don't know why I just didn't tell him that I was not a vegetarian. So the kid goes on to ask if I'm feeling healtheir now that I have given up meet (a point I made in my speech). Here I realized that I couldn't really admit that I wasn't a vegetarian because I already told him that it was 'going pretty good' for me. So, in order to give my speech credence, I told him that I infact was feeling healthier lately. The kid then tells me that he has decided to given up red meat. This made me kind of bad because he actually had given up meat and I was just lying about it. He told me how he was feeling healtheir ever since he gave it up and how he scored high on some sort of physical he took earlier in the week. I told him it was probably because he had given up red meat and then I reiterated the points in my speech about the negative effects of eating that kind of meat. "Well, have a good winter break," I said when we had finally reached the parking lot. And that was the end of my stint as a vegetarian.
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| Thursday, November 20th, 2003
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11:32 am - Looking for a job
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Got to sleep late this morning because both of my classes today were cancelled. I should do some homework today with all my free time but I probably won't. Actually what I really should do is find a job. There are a couple of possibilites: IRC (a telemarketing service down the road) and Old Navy (where one of Jen's roommates works). I tried applying at Friendly's but the boss told me to come back after the Thanksgiving break and she would probably hire me. I was going to until I went to my Communication Theory class the other day. We were talking about how everyone views the world from different perspectives, which lead into a discussion about age discrimination. It reminded me that when I told the Friendly's boss I was a colldge kid, she said something like, "oh...are you going to take this job seriously?....you're not going to be goofing off when your friends come in, are you?" What a jerk. I should have made fun of how old she was. But now that I realized she age-discriminated me, I will not be a part of her employment staff. But I'll probably still eat there because I like their chicken sandwhiches.
One more game until we are wallyball champs. For the unenlightened, wallyball is a sport similar to volleyball. It's played in a racket ball court where everything is in play. So you skillfully use the walls and the ceiling to your advantage.
I'm addicted to this playstation video game called Grand Theft Auto 3. Actually I was addicted to Grand Theft Auto: Vice City (the fourth game in the series) until somebody broke it. So the third one has taken its place. You just run around the city doing whatever you want. I prefer getting into car chases with the police.
Jen is doing good. She is coming up to my house for Thanksgiving because her parents are far away in Florida. It should be a good weekend; we are also going to Medeival Times for Ken's birthday, so that will be fun. She got me this sweet jersey for our sixth month anniversary. It says Delta Chi on the front, with my nickname and number on the back. It helped me win soccer and wallyball last night.
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| Saturday, November 1st, 2003
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10:04 pm - Some Great Movies
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Here are some movies I have never seen: The Matrix The Goonies Godfather I, II, or III Billy Madison Lord of the Rings (none of them) Saving Private Ryan Star Wars (none of them) Jaws Apollo 13 Toy Story Pulp Fiction
I think I may never watch some of these just because I like people's reaction when I tell them I've never seen Billy Madison, The Goonies, etc.
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Friday, October 31st, 2003
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1:53 pm - Mary Camden and Chainsaws
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I went into Friendly's for a job interview yesterday. The manager was giving me sass though, because I can't work the next couple of weekends. So, she told me to stop by again after Thanksgiving and we could set some stuff up. I'm still trying to figure out if she was just BS-ing me. Although she did seem impressed with my past frozen desert experience at Rita's.
It's homecoming and you know what that means. I need to build a float tonight. I'm feeling a little stressed though because I got papers out the wazoo due this upcoming week and I know I'm going to be too tired to do anything tomorrow.
Championship football game today versus Kappa Sig. We better win because I want the free t-shirt that accompanies victory.
Jen is good. We hang out at night. Last night we saw the new "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" movie. It was alright - it had some scary parts. It was sad to see Mary Camden running from a crazed maniac with a chainsaw. The dude definitley ran pretty fast for somebody carrying a chainsaw. But back to Jen - she is getting a promotion at work, which is cool because she hasn't even been there that long. We spend alot of time together at nights and on weekends, but hardly ever see each other during the day. Sixth month anniversary coming up soon, plus her Birthday.
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| Tuesday, October 21st, 2003
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10:42 pm - Practical Jokes in Triad
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My roomie thought it would be funny if he posted a message about me on the Rowan Website. It said something to the extent of I will be performing with my guitar in the student center pit on Wednesday night. It was all very funny. To get him back I put his underwear in the freezer. He responded by writing "Butt-Lord" in masking tape on my bedroom floor and changing my login password on my computer to "I Love Little Boys." This is far from over, but I need suggestions on ways of getting him back. Anybody?
We beat Kappa Sig in basketball tonight. It was a big win because this puts us in the finals of the tournament, plus they beat us the first time around so vengeance is sweet. I played alright, I had a lot of turnovers but I scored some points. Championship game is tomorrow night verse Phi Kap.
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Friday, October 17th, 2003
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12:23 pm - Weekend Update
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My ankle is all nice and purple from where I got kicked last weekend during soccer. It's getting better but it's taking forever. Big rematch on Saturday with the team that is responsible for the damaged ankle.
My Communication Theory professor, who is also my Public Speaking professor, was talking about participation the other day during my Comm Theory class. She said how, since she doesn't grade on participation in Comm Theory, that I am the only one who has to be graded on participation by her (referring to my participation grade in public speaking). "How do you think your participation grade in that class is?" she asked me. "Pretty good," I lied, knowing that I don't participate much in there. "Oh, really?" she said. "Well, usually I just focus on my upcoming speech, so I don't do much talking prior to the actual speech," I said. "You think I don't know B.S. when I hear it," she responded. That was pretty much the end of the conversation. I couldn't believe she called me on that in front of the whole class. Who does that?
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| Tuesday, September 30th, 2003
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11:06 am - Boring Update
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I'm at the computer lab wasting time until my 12:15 class. I should have walked back to triad and took a nap but I'm too lazy.
Yesterday was a good time. I slept through my sociology class, but attendance doesn't count in that class and he basically tells us word for word what is going to be on the tests. So I'm not too worried about missing a few classes. My next class, Logic, was supposed to be a meeting with my debate group to plan our presentation...our teacher wasn't even there. So, after our thorough, ten minute meeting we left. My third class of the day was cancelled so I went back to the apartment and played video games. I love college.
After our D Chi meeting last night I rode around on greg's bike (minus his helmet though). It was fun riding a bike in the cool night breeze. I should have brought mine to school to get to and from triad.
I'm going to try to get a job delivering pizza for P. John's. It seems pretty easy considering 99.97% of all orders probably come from people at Rowan. Plus, I heard they make about 11 bucks an hour (including tips). It would be nice to have a steady income again.
One of my apartment-mate's friends came over yesterday. He was wearing a backward, upside down visor. And he was white. C'mon dude, give me a break. He was, as the Offspring would say, pretty fly for a white guy.
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